Is this a series of paranoia or another bare truth?
-
I watched as he held his head up high with infinite excitement, ready to structure his dreams and fulfill his own wish, as well as hers. With a jar of materialistic hopes, almost ready-to-use. With a huge grin and a giddy voice, he nearly sounded like a little boy again, bragging about building his almost finished figurine.
But except this time, he wasn't building a figurine. Except this time, his jar was to be taken.
Twice, it has escaped from me. But now, my thoughts snapped back from my reverie of this visual dream. A dream I've longed for ever. A dream so trivial compared his.
Yet it is still my dream. A hunger I dare not deny.
The chance that once lies between my palms has escaped once again. Looking through his glasses, I thought how could I stop him from achieving his dream in order to achieve mine? How could I let this selfishness engulf me when it come to rights and wrongs?
Yet I just can't deny that I have this thirst to prove. This thirst to come out of her shadow that everyone sees instead of the former. This thirst to stand on my own feet and strike these assumptions and comparisons downside. This thirst to indirectly yell to people that I'm finally me, not someone's one.
I have this dying thirst, ready to be quenched.
But will it be quenched?
-
Maybe today, I have to compromise. After all, being the youngest, compromising is essential. Maybe tomorrow, things will be different. They said that once a door is closed, another opens. But where is that open door now?
I am so tired of searching for the little enchantments in life. Yet I can't stop searching. It hurts constantly whenever I have to give up my dreams in order for him and her to attain theirs. After all, theirs are more real, more crucial and undeniably fantastic. How could I compare mine to theirs?
Someday, my dreams will wake again. For now, it isn't the right time. I'm just going to let everyone get hurt if I let it out now. So, for now, as much as it hurts for me, as long they are happy, it's worth it.
Someday, maybe tomorrow, things will change.
But except this time, he wasn't building a figurine. Except this time, his jar was to be taken.
Twice, it has escaped from me. But now, my thoughts snapped back from my reverie of this visual dream. A dream I've longed for ever. A dream so trivial compared his.
Yet it is still my dream. A hunger I dare not deny.
The chance that once lies between my palms has escaped once again. Looking through his glasses, I thought how could I stop him from achieving his dream in order to achieve mine? How could I let this selfishness engulf me when it come to rights and wrongs?
Yet I just can't deny that I have this thirst to prove. This thirst to come out of her shadow that everyone sees instead of the former. This thirst to stand on my own feet and strike these assumptions and comparisons downside. This thirst to indirectly yell to people that I'm finally me, not someone's one.
I have this dying thirst, ready to be quenched.
But will it be quenched?
-
Maybe today, I have to compromise. After all, being the youngest, compromising is essential. Maybe tomorrow, things will be different. They said that once a door is closed, another opens. But where is that open door now?
I am so tired of searching for the little enchantments in life. Yet I can't stop searching. It hurts constantly whenever I have to give up my dreams in order for him and her to attain theirs. After all, theirs are more real, more crucial and undeniably fantastic. How could I compare mine to theirs?
Someday, my dreams will wake again. For now, it isn't the right time. I'm just going to let everyone get hurt if I let it out now. So, for now, as much as it hurts for me, as long they are happy, it's worth it.
Someday, maybe tomorrow, things will change.
0 comments:
Post a Comment